I fear 2023 may turn out to be the year of Nan questioning everything that happens–not complaining, mind you, just wondering why and trying not to chalk all manner of body issues up to, let’s say it together now–Nan’s fat ass.
This week has been truly awful, my friends, because I’ve had an abscessed molar that caused me incredible pain–worst pain ever, and I’ve had arthritis for years, a broken foot, and a baby without any anesthetic. People say mouth pain is the worst and they are not lying about that. I finally saw an endodontist on Thursday who said the tooth was too angry to work on that day, gave me steroids, antibiotics, and lots of sympathy and sent me home for 24 hours. All three helped a lot. On Friday, I had the procedure done with oral anesthetic (read Valium the night before and Ativan that morning), and it was a bearable thing, but today (Saturday morning), it’s still a little tingly numb and sore, which I was told by the endo was normal. How lovely to be normal (and best part, she never once mentioned my ass).
A few words about the oral anesthetic. I’d never taken either Valium or Ativan, although I’d heard that their effects were lovely. The Valium did help me sleep–which I needed since I hadn’t slept in two nights before the Thursday appointment. The Ativan gives you a sense of totally not giving a flip about much of anything, and it also makes your pupils disappear. It made me feel stupid–I didn’t like that part–and it made me a little unsteady on my feet. The steroid makes your cheeks red, but it does take away the arthritis pain and makes you feel like you could lift the world if your face didn’t hurt so much.
This month, my focus, sadly, is on my body–postponed due to weather, my heart nuclear testing happens on January 10, with test results consultation on January 17. Then first meeting with the new cardiologist on January 24, after which the fun continues with a mammogram on the 25… yes, I fear I may be becoming that old lady who goes to the doctor constantly. I’m pretty sure I asked two or three dear friends to slap me if that happened. Where the hell are you?
All in all, writing is my escape–In River’s Edge I’m the one who says what happens, I’m the puppet master, controlling people, events, and everyone’s health. Nan’s fictional world is a lovely place, even lovelier when her real world isn’t all that great. We shall bring both into alignment in 2023. Thanks for listening.
Gratitude for this week: Endodontist was kind and hopefully, this will be all fixed soon; Husband has been a rock through this; The book talk I had to cancel on Thursday is rescheduled; Only four weeks until Liz and I go on retreat! and time with Grandboy was quite wonderful!
Stay well, stay safe (wear your mask when you need to), be kind, and most of all, mes amies, stay grateful,