Gratitude,  Musings,  This Life...

Sunday Snippet: The Fashionista (Not!) Edition

So…I have two events that I’m attending next week–a gala for the arts group that DIL works for and my–get ready for it–50th high school reunion, and I need to decide what to wear for both events.

The gala is black tie optional and when Moe and I went last year, we wore nice dresses, but saw every possible kind of outfit there, including, believe it or not, black tie. Folks wore everything from shorts and T-shirts to gowns and tuxes. I liked wearing my dress, but I’m not a dress kind of girl. I feel, and I know how dumb this is so don’t bother berating me for it, I feel conspicuous.

I am not a small woman and dresses make me feel even bigger than I am. This is all in my head, my sister tells me, and she should know. She wears dresses all the time and looks fabulous in them. And I don’t think she’ll mind me telling you that she also is a big woman. It’s a family trait. But she wears clothes with style and panache. She loves all kinds of clothes and it shows.

I wear clothes mostly to keep from being naked in public.

Not that I don’t enjoy wearing nice things, I do. I am a girl, after all, and I like feeling girly and pretty. I get mani/pedis and have my hair blonded regularly. I wear makeup almost every day. I am pretty girly, really; I just don’t like wearing dresses. A caveat–I don’t mind little sundresses up at the lake–after a swim and a shower, they’re easy, cool, and comfy. It’s the dress-up dresses I can’t get into (no pun intended).

Here’s the thing, I don’t feel pretty in dresses. I just feel fat. I can dress up a pair of jeans with a flowery top and a nice sweater; or wear my skorts, shorts, and tank tops; or leggings and tunics and feel just fine. At my May book signing I took a big chance with a shirt that exposed my shoulders (they’re nice old shoulders for being the age they are and rather freckled), and I really loved the look, plus I was very comfortable.

Dresses–just not so much. So, at the gala I will wear my new black pants, a silky tank top, and a fun sort of Boho chic vest over the top. I’ll pull my hair up into a messy bun and wear a pair of dangly earrings and the gorgeous handmade quartz necklace that Son and DIL got me for my birthday last year. My nod to Sis’s excellent taste in clothes will be the gold sandals that she lent me to wear with the black and metallic gold dress she also lent me. Yes to the shoes, no to the dress.

For the reunion, I’ll wear my white jeans, the black silky tank top–French tucked this time–and my white denim jacket that I love and is so comfy. And yes, I realize that denim jackets can make you look bulky, but I’ll take that hit because the outfit is fun and gives me that successful writer vibe that I’m probably going to need at my 50th (gulp) high school reunion. Maybe I’ll toss on a colorful scarf for a pop of color… we’ll see.

Anyway all you fashionistas out there, let’s talk style. What’s your best look? What do you love to wear?

Gratitude for this week: Husband is getting so much stronger; fall is in the air; apples! It’s almost time for Liz and I to go on retreat, and Tule is having an author retreat next summer and I’m going! 

Stay safe, stay well, don’t get rid of those masks yet (and please wear them if you’re traveling), be kind, and most of all, amies, stay grateful,


  • Kimberly Field

    I think your choices sound perfect for you! You will feel beautiful if you wear what you think feels best on. I totally understand where you are coming from, but I am the opposite. I wear a lot of dresses and skirts, if I am going out, because I feel like I am huge in pants or jeans. I will wear leggings with a tunic, but mostly at home or running errands. On a side note, I did have this one piece dressy outfit that had palazzo pants and I absolutely loved it and always felt pretty when I wore it.

  • Kathleen Bylsma

    sounds good to me…if you are uncomfortable in your attire, you are not able to be at ease and showcase your real beauty

    • Nan

      Thank you, Kathleen–it is so true that if you are uncomfortable in what you’re wearing, you are too self-conscious to let your real self show. 😉

  • Maureen

    Good morning Nan!
    Well since we attending this gala together we better make our fashion decisions pretty soon. I’m leaning toward skinny black slacks and black tank top. A friend has lent me a kimono, cute but I’m still thinking on that. When see you maybe you can help me decide. Shoes are another story.

    Rich’s choice was always the “little black dress”. It’s was a wardrobe staple that I always loved. I liked dressing up and felt comfortable in dresses.

    See you soon.

    • Nan

      Hey, Moe! We’d be darling in our black pants and black tanks together. You do always look great in a little black dress, but didn’t you wear that last year? Hmmmm…we’ll decide when we see each other. Hugs, baby!

  • Janine

    I like the sound of your outfits. I don’t usually do dressy events. When I am unsure of what to wear, I wear black leggings or black jeans, a black tank top and some kind of kimono over the top. It looks semi-dressy, but comfortable and put together.