Nan in Search of Clarity–Day 7

KathiI’ve been thinking about sister Kate a lot today. Sometimes I can’t remember her face very well and that scares me because I don’t want to forget her face. She had a great face and the best smile and laugh ever. I’m at the lake and I don’t have all my photos handy here on my laptop. so I got on Facebook and found pictures of her–it’s a great face, but I still can’t look at the pictures without getting weepy.

MomAs I looked at FB pictures, I found the one of our mom that Kate had put up on FB at some point–Mother’s Day maybe or Mom’s birthday–May 13, which is often, as it happens also Mother’s Day. Anyway, I couldn’t help noticing how much they looked alike. Kate looked more like Mom each year. Don’t you think so? They had the same smile–one that lit up their eyes and lit up whatever room they were in.

Gosh I miss her. And it’s not like we talked every day or anything like that, but it’s that I knew she was there. Just like she knew I was there–at least, I hope she knew that. I have to believe she knew that. I couldn’t breathe if I thought she didn’t. She did. She knew.

Five things I’m grateful for today:

  1. Little green plants pushing up
  2. New friends I’ve made from Facebook
  3. Other writers
  4. I found a single serving package of jelly beans for half price today–exactly enough
  5. I got my walk in today, even though it rained and was chilly and wet and foggy




  • Carol M

    Sisters, such loving and not-so-loving relationships, especially if there is more than one sister. Kate knew and knows.

    Two halves and a whole sister. It was only when I was really angry with one of the halves that I would pull out the different fathers card, which was petty as my favourite sister is my eldest sister, mom’s side. Thinking about it, it is more than likely the birth order. but, who knows. Sisters know, it is in our DNA, we disagree, we fuss, we borrow each other clothes, we live different lives, we have unique talents, we put up boundaries, and in the end, we love.

    Watching my granddaughters navigate dynamics of sisterhood is very interesting. A mini class in character development.

    • Nan

      All you say is so true, Carol! Sisters are complicated and wonderful and sometimes a large pain in the ass, but always, always loving. Thanks for stopping by!

  • Margie

    I have two sisters–and there is no doubt that your sister knew you were there–it’s in our DNA, baby.

  • Carla Hampton

    Just recently my sister and I had a disagreement on something and the space between us became distant. Not a day went by that I didn’t think about her. She and I are extremely different and it has never been uncommon for us to think differently from one another but we love each other and that bond will always be there. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that your sister always knew you were there for her. ( and I didn’t even know her).

    • Nan

      Thanks for coming by, Carla. I know what you mean, my sister and I were very different, but got more alike as we got older, I think. The bond between you and your sister can’t be broken and the distance will heal itself it time. <>