my left footI’m currently healing from surgery on my foot. Not major surgery, but surgery nonetheless, and  I’m surprised at how much it’s affecting me. I guess I had it in my head that I’d be bouncing around a week after the surgeon removed several bone spurs, a cyst, and arthritis from the joint on the top of my foot. Um. I was wrong. I’m not bouncing. Hell, I’m not even walking all that well. It’s painful to put much weight on the foot, which is ugly with stitches and wrapped up in an Ace bandage. I’m disappointed that going up and down the stairs is work and that I have to wear this truly hideous flat post-surgery shoe. So why did I think this would be a snap? No one told me that. As a matter of fact, a couple of friends who’ve had the same type of surgery warned me that it would hurt, that I’d be laid up, and that I’d definitely want the pain meds. They were right, and now here, I am—propped on the sofa with my foot elevated and feeling like a slug.

The good news is that being laid up has given me time to reevaluate and to “heal” in other ways that I’ve needed to for several months—in other words, to heal my bratty attitude. Dealing with this getting-older-body stuff and reading Simple Abundance for the last two weeks is giving me new insight into what is truly important in my life. For the past few months, I’ve been dealing with that restless feeling—wanting things to be different, thinking I need to be somewhere else, go other places, live somewhere else. As I’ve been healing physically, unable to go anywhere or do much of anything, I’ve discovered how blessed I am, right here, right now.

My house is a warm cozy reflection of my life, not fancy or extravagant, but pleasant and inviting. Husband is a loving and giving man who willingly takes care of me, even when I’m not all that gracious. My friends are generous and kind, always ready to help me out. I have my dear Son, DIL, and Grandboy, with whom I can Skype and talk and text anytime I want. Only three more months and we’ll be opening the lake cottage again where I’ll be swimming and boating and enjoying summer evenings with dear friends. I live in a time where technology brings the world to me with click of a mouse button. I have a terrific job and the opportunity to do what I love most, which is write.

Rather than spending 2013 pouting and feeling like I’m missing something, I believe I’ll spend it relishing all the joys and blessings I have right here and now. I’m going to stop worrying about what I can’t have, what I can’t do, where I can’t go and be grateful for all I do have, what I can do, and where I can go. It doesn’t really matter whether life is everything you think it should be, what matters is whether you’re living your current life to the fullest because that’s all you’ve got. The here and now.

There are books to be revised and published, other people’s novels to read, and new authors to get to know. There are lake adventures ahead and dear friends and family to spend time with, a little one to cuddle, and laughter, good times, and wine to be shared…I’m in! How about you?



    • Nan

      Hey Judy, thanks for stopping by. Yeah, I’m trying…my biggest issue is living in the here and now, appreciating my life right now.

  • Robena Grant

    It certainly does take time, Nan. I had a torn meniscus and an arthroscopy, and it took months before it felt better, and my knee still swells and gives me a few days of pain if I overdo certain movements. My doctor told me it takes a solid year post surgery to properly heal. I was shocked, but you know what, he was right. : )

    I know you’ll be up and around soon, but take it easy when you are. We have to remember our bodies are not as young as they used to be…at least mine isn’t. Big hugs to you, and happy reading. Email me if you find a fantastic read. ; )

    • Nan

      Thanks, Roben! Everyone has been telling me to be patient and not expect to be running a foot race in the next couple of months. I’ll definitely send you some good reads, but for the moment, I’d highly recommend Liz Flaherty’s new book Jar of Dreams and Martha Reynolds’ Chocolate for Breakfast. Both great reads!!

  • Susan Courtney

    Nan, I have been going through a very similar journey with my back for the last two months. I have not ever had anything slow me down to this extent. I remember the first morning I woke up pain-free and realized what a true gift that is, not to be taken for granted. Every day since then I have been consciously thankful for my good health.
    Yes, I’m slower and still deal with weakness in my leg, but my life is blessings among blessings.r